I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
So gin and wine won't be happening again
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
