After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
