are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
