Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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