We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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