im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
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