Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Damn victory sex feels great
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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