I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.