He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone