I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Randomize
