The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
