I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Randomize
