you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Randomize
