I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
