Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize
