I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
