i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize