i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize
