not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Randomize
