Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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