Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
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Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
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That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.