I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
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