Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
