just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
Randomize
