do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
