Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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