She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
