if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
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