so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
