Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Randomize
