did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Your penis caused this!
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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