My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize