Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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