Texts From Last Night

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  (713): View more from Texas

  You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.

  (925): View more from California

  I'm not gay.

  (713): View more from Texas

  Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?

  (925): View more from California

  If ghandi gives good head...I'm in

  (713): View more from Texas

  Its fine.

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  (713): You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do. (925): I'm not gay. (713): Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me? (925): If ghandi gives good head...I'm in (713): Its fine. http://tfl.nu/3wbt
  Replies (3) Good night (1198) Bad night (660)
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  (269): View more from Michigan

  bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.

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  (269): bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile. http://tfl.nu/sd6y
  Replies (2) Good night (1091) Bad night (528)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed

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  (314): Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed http://tfl.nu/ltzi
  Replies (33) Good night (886) Bad night (2739)
• Favorite

  (+27): View more from South Africa

  I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.

  (+27): View more from South Africa

  I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.

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  (+27): I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake. (+27): I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better. http://tfl.nu/rfir
  Replies (39) Good night (4203) Bad night (1563)
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.

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  (405): I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine. http://tfl.nu/ew02
  Replies (8) Good night (3251) Bad night (1126)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment

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  (847): i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment http://tfl.nu/9by6
  Replies (3) Good night (2410) Bad night (1132)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  Be still, my beating vagina.

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  (619): Be still, my beating vagina. http://tfl.nu/qyal
  Replies (22) Good night (4466) Bad night (1080)
• Favorite

  (910): View more from North Carolina

  Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.

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  (910): Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap. http://tfl.nu/jw87
  Replies (4) Good night (1320) Bad night (1065)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs

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  (724): Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs http://tfl.nu/vayg
  Replies (5) Good night (1151) Bad night (431)
• Favorite

  (602): View more from Arizona

  Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!

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  (602): Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both! http://tfl.nu/0dax
  Replies (4) Good night (1357) Bad night (410)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio

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  (651): Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio http://tfl.nu/cnyx
  Replies (6) Good night (980) Bad night (600)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.

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  (973): They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard. http://tfl.nu/pxmg
  Replies (1) Good night (1072) Bad night (386)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.

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  (425): she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers. http://tfl.nu/95mp
  Replies (4) Good night (1120) Bad night (296)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once

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  (631): Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once http://tfl.nu/b35p
  Replies (8) Good night (679) Bad night (311)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM

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  (973): She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM http://tfl.nu/axe1
  Replies (1) Good night (453) Bad night (280)

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