Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
Randomize