i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
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