so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
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She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
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I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
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