We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Randomize
