im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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