I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Can vaginas get frostbite?
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
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