Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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