The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
