DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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