Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
