I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize