Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Randomize
