they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Randomize
