it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
Randomize
