New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Randomize
