Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize
