I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
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IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
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Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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