It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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